My dear friends, Jim and Sally Davis, visited me this week.  They live in Sacremento, but were visiting their daughter in Wisconsin, so they hopped on the bus to Midway, and I picked them up there. Today we reversed that process. 

   Although they were only here two days, we packed a lot in, a good deal of it to do with food.   We are fortunate in having many, many fine restaurants here, so I took Jim and Sally to three of them in two days:  Hannah's, Schu's, and Tabor Hill. (I actually cooked one night.  Yes, I do know how!)  Noel joined us for that last one, and I enjoyed seeing the reunion.  The Davis family and ours spent countless hours together in the 1960s, so Jim and Sally knew Noel very well when she was a little girl.  I don't believe they'd seen her for over 30 years, so there was some serious catching up to do.  Just as I enjoyed renewing my relationship with their son Vic, so now they have with Noel.   (Why do I want to keep singing that old Girl Scout song about making new friends, but keeping the old???) 

   I took the Davises to our charming art museum, the Krasl.  The museum has expanded their sculpture garden in the last few years and have some very interesting works there.  And then we walked around St. Joe and down by the beach.   But mostly we talked.   I love how when old friends get together it's like picking up the conversation from yesterday...not the weeks, months, years it actually is.  Some bonds just last. 

   Anyway, it was a delightful time; I am thrilled they came.  We are the kind of people who are good for each other I think; we have an uplifting effect, one upon the other.  Lovely.

  My friend Lois, with whom I grew up in upstate New York, is here for a visit.   I'm so excited to have her here, as this is something we've been planning for several years.  Each time it looked like we were all set, something came up, and the visit had to be cancelled.   Even this time, I wasn't willing to believe she'd make it until I actually saw her in Midway Airport.  And that is exactly what happened Tuesday evening...the plane arrived, and there she was!

 

  Wednesday we poked around St. Joe and just did a lot of catching up with each other.  Yesterday we took a museum trip into Chicago. Other friends,  Pat and Norma joined us.   Those pictures are posted to the left.   The main purpose of this trip was to see the Edward Hopper/Winslow Homer exhibit at the Chicago Art Institute.   That was very nice, although the museum is undergoing a lot of construction right now, so I actually felt a bit lost there!   I love Hopper's work, especially from his New York period when he was painting all those women in cloche hats, and of course his very famous one of the restaurant.   I had not realized he had done a whole series of houses from Gloucester, MA and Cape Cod.   Those were quite interesting, too.

 

   We had lunch at the Italian Village, which has been an integral part of the Chicago restaurant scene for eons.    The food was wonderful, and we loved where they sat us in a corner booth that was basically a small private room.    Do you think they knew we'd be noisy?  There were only four of us after all!  LOL   

 

  Then, as with all out-of-towners who visit,  I dragged everyone to Millenium Park.  As you can tell from the photos, what I most love there is Cloud Gate, the "Bean."   It's just a stunning sculpture and a lot of fun to play with, watching ourselves and the reflected scenery.   

 

      We then wandered around Marshall Fields  ( I REFUSE to call it Macy's) for a while;  hit the museum gift shop, then off for the bus home.

 

   There was a snag at that point, as one person did not show up on time.  After waiting fifteen minutes (at which point I would have just left), the tour director started making phone calls trying to get this woman's cell number.   She finally got it, dialed...and, you guessed it, the woman didn't have her cell on.   Eventually the woman called us.  She was not even at the museum or anywhere near it.  She was up Michigan Avenue at the Watertower Place.   So here we were, already over an hour late heading home, and we had to drive up there to pick her up.    Sure hope the Krasl :  A)  Develops a policy for how long they will wait for a person;  B)  Puts this woman on a "never again" list.   

 

  But, obviously, we did make it back home.  Lois and I were ready for a nice glass of wine by then which we enjoyed with a California Kitchen pizza.   So it really was a wonderful day.

 

  And the best part for me was getting to do all this with the person I used to play paperdolls with, wander the woods with; heck,  learned to walk with!

      Remember back in February when I ran out to LA to attend a baby shower?   Erika and Brandon are very close friends of Di and Dave's.  The shower was wonderful  fun, and not the least of that for me was the opportunity to spend some time with these friends of the family. Photo at left is Erika and Brandon with Diana.   Their whole gang was there, and I really enjoy this group of young people.    Well, not so young anymore I guess as they all move into their 30s.  HA!  Let's see, where was I during my 30s??   Hmmm;  first Columbus, then Piqua, Ohio.   Seems like an eternity ago.  But I digress.  The really important news is this:

 

     Harper Lee was born March 16.   Isn't she gorgeous?   I'm practically drooling with desire to get my hands on her!   The reports that come my way indicate that Harper is not only lovely to look at, but a good-natured little thing, too.  Anyway, as the title of this entry implies,  I really do believe a baby is about the most lovely thing on earth.   Harper weighed in at 7 lbs, 15, oz and was 21.5 inches long, so a wonderful size.  Congratulations to all three members of this vibrant family! 

It was interesting being back in the classroom.  I can't believe how tired I was from only four hours a day of work!   It is, as it happens, a very intense four hours.  The students get two ten-minute breaks, but the staff has much to do during that time.   So one of the things I'm having to remember about teaching is pacing.   There are ways to manage a classroom that don't involve the teacher being "on" the whole time.  By Thursday, I was starting to remember some of that, so that was a better day.   I do love teaching, however, so I'm looking forward to this brief trip back to school. (It's until May 31)  Noel is the aide in my class, and how wonderful to work with her.  She has been so busy with work, home, kids, husband, volunteer work, that I haven't spent much time with her since September.   This is a perfect remedy!

 

As you know, I had just returned from a fairly long visit to LA when I started back to work.  Consquently,  my house is dusty, laundry from the trip is piled up, etc., etc., etc.    Guess you know what I'm doing today.  I totally dislike having my house in a chaotic state.  By tomorrow it should be back to normal so that I can read the Sunday paper without chores screaming at me from every corner. 

 

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Unrelated to the above, but very much on my mind, is friendship.  I wrote earlier in the week about my powerful reconnection with friends in Sacremento.   I have moved so many times, that I've made and lost more friends than I can count.  There are a few here and there, however, that I've managed to stay in touch with.  Two of these are friends from upstate New York, Lois and Ann.  Lois was my growing up neighbor and inseparable friend.  We are just six weeks apart in age and share many interests, so our friendship was very close when we were young.  Then we sort of disappeared into our adult lives.  Throughout it all, though, we have stayed in touch.  Lois lives up the hill behind the house my mother shared with my sister.  That made it possible for us to visit back and forth whenever I was in town.  After mother died,  Mary K's home was filled to overflowing with relatives, so I stayed up the hill with Lois.  What fun we had!   We had huge blocks of time together, and that was such a treat.  It's very special to sort of rediscover someone you liked so much, but didn't know quite as well anymore;  to rediscover how very much you still liked and admired that person.   We still have a lot in common, and there was no lag in the conversation.  Plus,  it just feels so good to have that long-time connection made stronger. 

 

The other friend I mentioned, Ann, was a neighbor in Delmar, NY.   We met because we had children the same age and lived around the corner from each other.  When we were both full-time moms, we spent many, many hours together.  We discussed everything from MS Magazine (which Ann had introduced me to) to politics, children, you name it.   Ann has such an intellectual range; I believe there is no subject she could not discuss without knowledge.   This certainly makes her one of the more interesting people I know to talk with.  We also, in the late '60s, early '70s,  had boundless energy.  Sometimes (ok, fairly often), we put that energy to use rearranging furniture.  We had a pretty good laugh about that when I stayed there last fall.  Ann told me that her husband would come home from work on one of our furniture moving days and comment, "I see Barbara has been here."  LOL     It's the staying there that I started this entry to write about, because as with Lois, I was able to spend some significant time with Ann as her houseguest.   Just being able to relax together over Tom's wonderful coffee in the morning gave us such an opportunity to remember each other, the depth, the caring, the myriad ways we liked, and still like, each other.

 

I am so blessed in my friendships.   Life would be a sad and empty place without them.  Here are photos of me with both of these dear friends--Ann left, Lois, right.

 

 

Lloyd, my close friend's husband, died during the night.   Lloyd was one of those people who knows everyone, never met a stranger, and was very involved in community affairs, particularly his local fire department.   The fire chief happened to stop by while I was over there yesterday, and I'm so glad he had that chance to say goodbye...and to tell Lloyd that funds had been approved for a new truck.  Lloyd was conscious enough to hear that and register his pleasure.     And so he died as he lived...thinking of others, of the needs of the community.   This is a man who will be sorely missed.

 

Lloyd and Joyce, and Oscar and I, celebrated our wedding anniversaries together every July; they were just one day apart.  We also frequently attended social events together.   I know how much Lloyd has missed Oscar.  Sure hope they're up there having a drink together and catching up on all the news.

 

May he rest in peace.

 

 

 

A couple of days ago I mentioned that a close friend's husband had a reccurence of a cancer that was supposedly cured in  1999.   He had passed his five year mark.......and isn't that supposed to be the magic number for cancer survivors?   Anyway, he is in the hospital again after a brief trip home.

 

On Saturday I went over to keep my friend company.  This is one of those dear people who never left my side during Oscar's hospitalization.  There's no way I'm going to leave her alone now.  My intent was to help her stay cheerful.  Boy, did I fail at that.  Seeing him lying on that bed, looking so much like Oscar, was difficult enough;  then, mid-conversation, Joyce mentioned their dog had died on Sunday.  Ohmigosh!  I had to leave after that...and somehow made it to the parking lot before I started sobbing. 

 

Sunday I stayed away, but today I'm going back. "A friend in need...."  and all that, right?   I never would've made it through Oscar's hospitalization and death without my friends and family gathered around, shoring me up.  Joyce doesn't have much family nearby, but she has friends, one friend in particular who will be there with her; and if we cry, well, we just do.

 

 

 

 

My friend Daphne died just before Christmas.  She was only 43 years old, and, yes, it was cancer.  What an ugly, unspeakable affliction, taking beautiful people in the prime of their lives.

 

Daphne and I met in 1994, when we both started working for the same small Michigan college.  We were hired to work in an outreach program, and that put us on the road much of the time.  It's amazing how fast people can get to know each other when they're spending many hours cooped up in an automobile, and in our case, wandering around LOST much of that time.   We discovered how much we had in common:  both had college educated mothers and blue collar fathers;  both were from families with four children;   both  were dedicated to helping people get ahead in life, me through education, she through social work.  Our senses of humor were similar, and we laughed and laughed as we drove all over creation trying to find an adult education center or a drug rehab clinic.

 

We made presentations to groups and then worked with individual clients, helping them continue their education, helping them develop some sort of plan for the next stage of their lives.   Our presentation styles were so similar, that on one occasion, a person who had been working with Daphne came over to me and said "I think it was you who helped me???"   I said it had been Daphne, and the response was, "Well, you look so much alike, I couldn't remember which one of you it was."   !!!    You can imagine the good laugh we had over that.  From then on, we frequently referred to ourselves as "the twins."

 

Daphne leaves a husband and two teen-age sons.  It seems so wrong, so unfair.   Why?  we ask.  And there is no answer.  Wherever she is now, that is surely a better place because she is in it.  Rest in peace, my dear friend.

 

 

 

 

Our friends Pam and Geoff arrived last night in time for an old-fashioned pot roast dinner.  These are the kind of friends who seem like family. We know them that well, have been through that much with them.

 

It was a quiet night, just sitting around talking after dinner.  And once we'd caught up on all of each others' news and seen the baby pictures, we started pulling books off the shelf...for these dear friends read as much as we do, and what a joy that is.  So the exchange of books and ideas was on.   Is there a more pleasant way to spend an evening?  

Do you ever have days that are so activity-flled they just seem like one big blur?  That was my day yesterday.

 

I had set the alarm for 5:00 so I could pick a friend up at 6:00 and take her to the hospital.  Some part of me always knows when an alarm is set and wakes me up before it goes off.  This was convenient when I worked; now, well, it's just annoying.  Anyway,  I woke up at 4:30 and bounded out of bed in the usual fashion.

 

Picked up Pat; dropped her at hospital entrance; found parking place (I wonder how big hospitals and their parking lots will get.....they are so enormous already);  went in and kept her company; waited;  kept her company in pre-op; waited; talked to the surgeon after the surgery.   His first words to me were, "And how exactly are you related to Pat?"   I responded, "We are sisters by choice."   He smiled and gave me the info about the surgery.   It went well,  thank God.  I called her daughters and mother, all far away, to make a report.

 

So then I waited some more until  the nurse called to say Pat was being transferred to  a hospital room and was I a relative?   Yes, I still was her sister.   So I accompanied her to her room.  Since she was pretty much out of it, I left to..............race home!  My sister-in-law from Alaska is our houseguest right now.  I obviously had not spent any time with her, so we picked up Noel and the three of us went out to lunch. 

 

After that I went back to the hospital to check on Pat.        She was groggy and didn't really need anything, so I went back home to grab a quick nap.  Just as I was drifting off, the phone rang.  It was Bob, my son-in-law.  Did I realize, he asked, that Orkin has just de-flea'd their home?  Yup, knew that.  BUT...I didn't know that they needed to stay out of the house for three hours.  Could he and the dog come over?  SURE.

 

So now we have Oscar, his sister, Bob, and a black lab over here. Forget the nap.  But where was Austin?  Noel had just told me at lunch that Bob was picking him up.   Bob thought Noel had him.   Hmmmmm.  Why was only grandma worried about a loose 6 year old? 

 

Well, the men didn't seem to know what to do, so I hopped in the car and raced over to the Girl Scout recruiting meeting.  There was Austin.  Whew.   Noel realized she had given me wrong info and felt silly, but no harm done.  

 

I learned that Bob and Austin had 5 pm haircuts scheduled, then Cub Scouts at 6:30.  I asked if she wanted me to feed them both so they could get on with it.  Sure didn't see how Noel was going to cook if they couldn't get in their house.

 

So I went back home; cooked dinner; fed Bob, Austin, Oscar and Corky. 

 

We were just finishing when Noel and Emily walked in the front door.......hungry.  LOL  So they ate dinner, too.  This was getting a little like the loaves and fishes. 

 

While Oscar cleaned up the dishes, I went back to the hospital to see if Pat was more conscious.  She was, and we chatted for a while. 

 

Back home;  Noel had taken Austin to Cubs; Bob and Em were still there.  We all sat on the patio and chatted for a while.  At 7:15 they left.

 

I headed straight for a bubble bath and bed!